Homemaking

I just finished reading Dr Laura's book The Proper Care and Feedings of Husbands for the second time. Its an amazing book. A lot of women wont read it because they think it sounds sexist but seriously if you read it it actually is somewhat derogatory towards men. She says they are simple and if you understand the few things they need and meet those things, they will do anything for you. The funny thing is that I think most men would agree and not be offended by that assessment.

I think what I love most about the book is that she helps remind me that John is my partner. He has different roles than I do. My role is to take care of the home. Yes, the mundane chores get old after doing them over and over and over but its the role that I chose. Its the role that I want. It gives me so much freedom to be creative, flexible, and choose to do fun and exciting things during the day. I don't have a boss to answer to and if I want to take a day off an be a little more lazy, I can. Not only that I am so grateful that I can be here to raise our sons.

But my role also comes with a lot of power over the lives of those in my care, including John. Where much is given, much is required. When I am happy and keep our house clean and running smoothly I feel happy and satisfied and that is reflected by everyone in our family.

Boys don't change much in my opinion. Husbands are just grown up boys.

My sons need a lot of validation and a lot of affection from me. Just a few days ago Davis came up to me and said, "Hug Davis, Mom." I gave him a hug and smothered him with some kisses and then he ran off to continue playing. I am constantly having to look at what they did and I get asked about 10 times a day, "did I do a good job?" John is more subtle in his asking but he still has the same needs for validation and affection.

Having a husband to care for is not a right, its a privilege.

A privilege he gave me when he chose me to be his wife and companion.

I'm just glad to be reminded how lucky I am and sad that sometimes I need a reminder to treat John like the amazing man that he is. I'm not his mother, I'm not his boss or his manager.

I'm his partner.

He needs respect and consideration as much as I do and if I give it, I will get it. He works hard too, it might be different work but he still gets up every morning, hours before I do, to go to work for us. I appreciate him for that.

If you haven't read the book, I would recommend it.

I wish I had read it long before I was ever married.