Wednesday, February 8, 2012

A chill pill

We were at the park yesterday for a long time. The kids were warm despite the cold temperatures and the breeze. Me, I was freezing despite my coat, scarf, and gloves. I couldn't get warm the rest of the day. Finally when all the Tuesday night activities were done and the kids were tucked into bed, I took a hot bath.

Right before I took my bath I decided to take a chill pill. The week my Mom passed my Dr prescribed me some anti anxiety pills. Just 10 of them and told me to take a quarter when things were rough because it would take the edge off without making me feel numb. It worked like a charm! I have used them over the last year when things would get to rough for me to handle.

As I soaked in the hot water last night I felt the coldness of my poor shivering body warm slowly as well as the coldness in my heart simply melt away.

I feel so much better today, so much more at peace. I'm lying here listening to Becks and Davis play happily together and feeling so content at this moment.

Heavenly Father gave us our agency, I cant change that - I wouldn't change that. I may not like the choices others make but I can protect my family from them. We have already made big strides in that direction. Now I just have to let the rest go. And I am...

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